Since you're gone my empty arms have nothing left to hold

Title: the fake gay couple from Cincinnati
Rating: PG13, mostly for wackiness
Characters/Pairing: Mark Pellegrino, Titus Welliver; mentions of half of the Lost/Supernatural cast, with Misha Collins being particularly present. Yes, yes, I know.
Words: 3000 ca
Summary: where Mark Pellegrino realizes that it's destiny that he and Titus Welliver star in things together, Misha Collins is a smooth bastard, they talk about conventions and fanfiction and their Lost scripts and they are totally bffs. And they also want a spin-off.
Spoilers: ee. For the Lost finale, sort of for Twisted, some for SPN S5, then if you consider them spoilers, also for Moving Alan, Dexter and Deadwood. Tho the last three are really stuff you'll find on the IMDB summary.
Disclaimer: Mark Pellegrino, Titus Welliver and everyone else mentioned in this are so NOT mine. Really. They sooo are not. NOTHING IS!
A/N: written for former Queen gottalovev at lostsquee. Uh. She asked for bffs. Her icon had Mark Pellegrino & Titus Welliver. She also said she would like RPF and crossovers. This... IDEK where the fuck this came from but it features those two being bffs, mentions of half of the SPN cast which I guess features as a crossover and it's totally crack. I hope it's to your liking and sorry for the lateness! Seriously. I haven't written RPS in ages, I feel so weird.
A/N 2: now, this stuff is full of references, but I feel like I need to link at least a couple of things or otherwise stuff might be obscure: Buzzline interview (from where the title is from, sorta), EW's Totally Lost part 5 (six is in the links on the left), Moving Alan (this is the part where there's Misha Collins and Mark. Mark is the clown that gets on fire), Twisted's IMDB page. This should cover mostly everything. Re the stories from conventions... well, it's all true, lol.

( “What?” Mark asks, “Are you starring in this, too?” // “I’m your goddamn horseman,” Titus smirks back, and Mark wonders if someone up there isn’t doing this on purpose. )

Oh dear WHAT HAVE I DONE FF WHAT HAVE I DONE. The luau is already making damage here.

: the perks of being a space pirate
: light NC17
: Charlie/Desmond, then ORGY. And when I say ORGY, I mean ORGY. In capital letters.
: 6500
: the Lost/Firefly fusion where Sawyer has a ship, Miles is his second-in-command, Desmond is the ship's priest, a bunch of other people are there, the key word on the ship is free love and Charlie is the musician Sawyer just hired. And where the hero of Canton is Sayid, but he hates that song.
: er, AU? For Lost none really, for Firefly general premises and some stuff but really, it's a fusion so no one from Firefly actually appears.
: I don't own anything. Joss Whedon, please forgive me for this. Darlton not so much.
: the gracious Queen toestastegood asked for 'the future' lostsquee luau. Today, I spent six hours in a library copying notes regarding Kant. I had the idea while doing that. Obviously it probably means I need my head checked, but still. I also wrote it while listening on repeat to the original Hero Of Canton song, and I probably shouldn't have. This is crack, sort of, so my only advice would be: don't take it too seriously. And I hope it fits the bill. ;) and since I'm here, using for au_abc, outerspace, and au_bingo, criminals. Oh dear what have I done. Also: all the planet names were used on Firefly and Wikipedia says it. I don't have the imagination for coming up with that kind of stuff.

( Our love for him now ain't hard to explain, the Hero Of Canton, the man they call Sayid. )

Augh. I was sure I had LESS stuff to re-post. Anyway. These are all either for the Five Acts meme or from the lostsquee fic battle back in January. Not using my usual header format, but if I did this would clog up half of your f-lists and really, not. These is all Lost and all slash. Het is coming tomorrow along with the fandoms that are NOT Supernatural. Which is coming on Sunday.

--

Desmond/Sayid:

The Flesh Is Weak
Desmond/Sayid; S4 spoilers. 613 words, NC17; not mine.
Sayid probably doesn’t even know, but the way his hands are sure and practiced as he picks the broken engine part up and breaks it in pieces and observes it, the way they’re dirty with grease but still functional is making things to Desmond’s stomach.
A/N: originally written for the lostsquee fic battle, for the prompt gear; using for lostpicksix #36, quickie.
Because the flesh is weak, the old saying recites, and it’s generally true.

I Gazed A Gazeless Stare
Desmond/Sayid; 6x12 spoilers. 1372 words, NC17, warning for light bondage and breath-play; not mine.
“Brother, I just was tryin’ to get a reaction out of you. Seems like I did it, aye?”
A/N: originally written for wandersfound for the Five Acts meme (prompts: breathplay, hurt/comfort/kissing); using for lostpicksix #3, kink. Title from Nirvana/David Bowie.
Desmond’s eyes open up and stare right back into Sayid’s and if he’s surprised at having been tied against the tree, he doesn’t show it.

We'll Meet On Edges, Soon
alt!Desmond/alt!Sayid; 6x13 spoilers. 814 words, light R; not mine.
“Aren’t you afraid that someone will catch you, eventually?”; “I reckon that one day they will, but by then my job will be done.” Desmond shrugs, and Sayid doesn’t ask what the job is. He’s sure he won’t get an answer anyway.
A/N: originally written for aboutbunnies for the Five Acts meme (prompts: fugitives, kissing); using for lostpicksix #12, motel.
At times, Desmond disappears and Sayid stays at the motel.

---

Jack/Boone:

You Look At Me Now And Don't Think I Don't Know
Jack/Boone; S3 finale spoilers. 295 words, PG13, warning for drug use and Nirvana!Jack; not mine.
“You can’t do this to yourself,” Boone keeps on, a hand on Jack’s wrist squeezing it lightly and it’d feel just so good, so warm, so alive if only Jack’s fingers weren’t brushing against Boone’s own wrist. There’s no pulse. He can’t even have a proper delusion, these days.
A/N: originally written for the lostsquee fic battle for the with the prompt pills; using for lostpicksix #15, intoxicated. Title from Steve Earle.
“You should quit them,” Boone says softly, sitting on the edge of Jack’s battered mattress.

Outside Looking In
Jack/Boone, Sawyer; spoiler-free, set in S1. 701 words, NC17, warning for rimming and voyeurism; not mine.
Where Sawyer is innocently taking a walk and stumbles over something he really wasn't expecting to see. Ever.
A/N: originally written for haldoor for the Five Acts meme (prompts: rimming, voyeurism). Using for 2x5obsessions #5, entwined.
Well, he figures, next time he needs a free peep show, he can keep an eye on those two.

--

Other pairings:

When You're Down And Out
Miles/Daniel; spoilers up to 5x08. 589 words, PG13; not mine.
If you had asked him on the freighter, he’d have laughed in your face. Because really. Sharing a bed with Daniel Faraday in the seventies in the worst tropical heat ever existed?
A/N: originally written for ozmissage for the Five Acts meme (prompts: kissing, hot nights, sharing a bed, domesticity). Using for chem15try #12, transition state. Title from Simon & Garfunkel.
Miles is actually fine with it, all things considered.

At Dusk The Stars All Appear
Jack/Sawyer; set early-ish in the series so spoiler-free. 670 words, light r; not mine.
Jack never asked him what was in his letter, and Sawyer won’t ask him why he inks stars on his biceps.
A/N: originally written for gemjam for the Five Acts meme (prompts: tattoos, stars). Title from Bruce Springsteen.
Sometimes Sawyer thinks he should ask Jack why the hell would he get stars tattooed on his arm.

It's A Long Way Down To Nothing At All
Jack/Sayid; early S6 spoilers (set before 6x05). 639 words, light NC17; not mine.
“I don’t care what they said,” Jack whispers low as he pushes Sayid back against the wall of the Temple’s room with the pool, feeling like he needs closeness to say this, “you’re not dead or going dark side or whatever he means. You’re not. Hear me? Not under my watch.”
A/N: originally written for mollivanders for the Five Acts meme (prompts: worrying for someone, wall sex). Title from U2.
Jack needs to make his point.

Black Becomes Me Well
Jacob/Man in black; spoilers up to the S5 finale. 432 words, PG13; not mine.
The chessboard rests on the sand, undisturbed by the waves; they just don’t reach it, nor the two men sitting on the opposite sides of it.
A/N: originally written for the lostsquee fic battle, with the prompt chess. Title from a quote from The Seventh Seal.
The one dressed in white has the black side, the one dressed in black has the white.

It'll Wash Away
dead!Boone/dead!Charlie; spoilers up to the S3 finale. 1058 words, PG; not mine.
“I’m the only one who remembers, but you all… arrive like this. Anyway, your name is Charlie Pace and you were with me in a plane crash.”
A/N: originally written for the lostsquee fic battle, with the prompt amnesia. Title from Steve Earle, sort of.
He had sort of hoped that with Charlie it would be different.

Sacrifices Suck (but it could be worse)
Boone/Charlie/the smoke monster; spoilers up to the S5 finale, warning for tentacle sex, utter and unrepentant crack, wackiness and possible mental scarring. 1431 words, NC17; not mine, in this case luckily.
The only sensible answer they agreed upon was trying to stop the smoke monster from interfering; without such an ally out of the field (for not-John, of course), things would have been at least evened out; and then the problem became, how the fuck were they going to distract the smoke monster?
A/N: originally written for the lostsquee fic battle, with the prompt tentacle sex. This is all toestastegood's fault, by the way. And I warned you up there. Don't say I scarred you for life.
Sometimes Boone thinks that if there were prizes for people who didn’t learn their lesson even after death, he and Charlie would have won them all already with honors.

---

Duuuh. Will probably crosspost tomorrow so that I don't clog all fic comms at the same time. :/

Title: Sacrifices Suck (but it could be worse)
Rating: NC17
Warnings: tentacle sex (yes, YES, I know), utter crack, wackiness.
Pairing: Boone/Charlie/the smoke monster
Words: 1431
Summary: The only sensible answer they agreed upon was trying to stop the smoke monster from interfering; without such an ally out of the field (for not-John, of course), things would have been at least evened out; and then the problem became, how the fuck were they going to distract the smoke monster?
Spoilers: up to the end of S5. Clearly, seeing the premise, this is now absolutely AU. For once, thankfully.
Disclaimer: Lost isn't mine, duh. But I swear that THIS WOULD NOT happen on it if it was mine.
A/N: originally written for the lostsquee fic battle. The prompt was tentacle sex. BTW, it's ALL toestastegood's fault. I SWEAR IT IS. Anyway. THIS IS NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY. I warned you that it's crack on a stick. I don't want anyone's sanity on my conscience. It implies that the smoke monster and the man in black are NOT the same person.

( Sometimes Boone thinks that if there were prizes for people who didn’t learn their lesson even after death, he and Charlie would have won them all already with honors. )

So, uh. This stuff exists because for some random reason last week I ended up listening to Ronan Keating on youtube without any reason except that when I was like TEN my favorite song was the title song. Then after I was like 'wtf is with me' on Twitter someone who shall be named in the A/N was like 'well maybe it's because he sounds kind like Jensen at times' and I was like 'duh that's a point' and then we were like 'there should be fic' and so I figured well, fine there should, and it should be crack. Then it ended up not being completely crack and way too long, but I'll cut it now.

Title: When You Say Nothing At All
Characters/Pairing: Dean/Castiel, Sam
Rating: PG for swearing, mostly.
Wordcount: 5200
Spoilers: heavy for 5x14. (Actually, it's kind of a whacked tag.)
Warnings: karaoke, Sam singing Mariah Carey, smash of canon angsting with probably unrepentant schmoop (I mean, you've seen the title), drunk people who don't necessarily think straight and karaoke.
Disclaimer: SPN isn't mine and nothing else is either. Thankfully, I dare say.
Summary: where Dean and Sam are wasted, Castiel is the only sober one, dares happen, karaoke happens and Dean dedicates country songs to Castiel even if he hates country music and it's totally chick flick, except that Castiel doesn't care anyway.
A/N: imora_mi_savur has her share of Twitter-guilt for this and I won't really start going into it if only to preserve my mental sanity. It was supposed to be crack. Then it took a life of its own and became a 5x14 coda which is why it isn't exactly total crack. And just to be clear: why I won't deny liking When You Say Nothing At All, I hate Mariah Carey.

( It happens because Dean is drunk. No, there's no other reason. )

Okay. Er. This is crack.

Title: That's How You Know He's Your Love
Pairings/Characters: eventual Dean/Castiel and Sam/Anna (also Sam/Castiel and Dean/Anna); Lucifer, Crowley, Gabriel (sort of), Ben, most of the characters appear.
Rating: PG13
Word Count: 10000 this part, around 30000 overall.
Disclaimer: Supernatural is most definitely not mine, and Enchanted is Disney's. The only thing I provide is the crack.
Warnings: sort of voluntary mocking purple prose in the fairytale-ish bits, Gabriel is the chipmunk (yes, that's a warning in itself), possible fluff overload (but you've seen the source material, right?), crack-ish stuff, hell, this is a fusion with a goddamn Disney movie. This is definitely not to be taken (too) seriously.
Summary: Enchanted fusion wherein Castiel falls from Heaven into New York City because of evil king Lucifer, Dean is the cynical single father divorce attorney whose life changes when they meet, Sam is a prince who is definitely intent on finding his beloved who was stolen from him, and Gabriel, even if he's a chipmunk, is definitely the sanest of the bunch.
A/N: this is a (hopefully decent) birthday present for wandersfound, who stuck the idea into my head and then since her birthday was close and I am indeed a crazy person so I decided I'd write it. To my defense, I cut out all the cute animals and cut down 95% of the singing and tried to trim the sugar as much as possible, but the base plot is that one. And I have it all written but I suck at being brief so I'm splitting it in three parts which I'll post in three days. Er. I said it, but don't take this seriously. Really. Part II, Part III.

( Once upon a time, in the magical kingdom of Heaven.... seriously? Seriously. )

I saw this at gottalovev's and I figured I'd try it. Not like I haven't written most of these during pedagogy class and not like it isn't the crackiest crack that ever cracked except when I ended up writing serious angst but whatever. Also, 15 words? HARD.

1. Write down the names of 10 characters.
2. Write a fic of fifteen words or less for every prompt, using the characters determined by the numbers. Do NOT read the prompts before you do step 1.

1. Boone Carlyle (Lost)
2. Castiel (Supernatural)
3. Eddie Dean (Dark Tower series)
4. Sayid Jarrah (Lost)
5. Roland Deschain (Dark Tower series)
6. Dean Winchester (Supernatural)
7. Crowley (Good Omens)
8. Nathan Petrelli (Heroes)
9. Mal Reynolds (Firefly)
10. Rorschach (Watchmen)

( craziness underneath )

Seriously. What. I'll go edit stuff. And write stuff. And maybe I'll do a real entry tonight since I have Steve Earle squee to share.

Title: How Castiel Got Lost In LOST (or, how an angel of the Lord faced the Smoke Monster, among the rest)
Rating: PG13
Characters: Castiel, Dean and Sam for SPN; Sayid, Sawyer, Smokey, Jacob and a few guest stars for Lost
Words: 3333 (really.)
Summary: the Trickster sends Castiel on the island. Chaos ensues.
Spoilers: heavy for 5x08 for SPN; set in late S2 for Lost, but there's a character from the S5 finale.
Disclaimer: SPN is not mine and Lost is not mine either. Why, you had any doubts?
A/N: this is crack on a stick. More or less. And I can blame at least three or four people from my FL who totally didn't try to dissuade me from writing this. Anyway, a couple of other shows are mentioned in passing. And... just, alright, I have no excuses except for SPN handing me this on a silver plate and Lost being crazy stuff.

( When Castiel realizes that he’s on what looks like a tropical island or a jungle, he blinks. Then when nothing changes, he blinks again. )

Okay, I was done with this, let's go with it. At least I'm starting with the stuff I owe. I swear the rest is coming soon.

Title: Just Some Love
Rating: PG, and the P is because of the swearing probably
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Words: 1812
Summary: That bastard son of a bitch of a ghost of a country singer had turned all of his collection into Keith Urban tapes.
Spoilers: uh, let's say general S4. No specific episodes but it's set after, so..
Disclaimer: not mine, definitely not mine.
A/N/Warnings: okay, so at that meme ibroketuesday asked for Dean/Castiel crack and... uh, clearly this isn't a drabble but I can't do drabbles, especially if crack, and I fear that the premise is crack but then it got kinda on the sweet side, but I tried. ;) Using also for sacred_20 #10, curse. Warning: a lot of Keith Urban. -nod- (And I actually like him. I'm just objective, but I love him anyway *cough*).

( “Cas, man, it’s… Keith Urban. I mean, he’s evil. Like, evil. My poor tapes.” )

Title: A Job Well Done
Rating: PG13 for some swearing
Pairing/Characters: Dean/Castiel, John, Uriel, Sam, Anna, Jimmy, Bobby, God (really), a lot of other mentions.
Words: 2128
Summary: things don't go exactly smooth at the reception of Dean and Castiel's bonding ceremony. Blame a reintegrated Uriel and a not-very-enthusiast John Winchester.
Spoilers: for the whole of S4. Then... crack speculation I guess.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the crack, and not even the basic idea since it was a prompt.
A/N: written for the Dean/Castiel kink meme for the prompt Uriel and John Winchester: probably not the best guys to end up seated together at Dean & Castiel's wedding/bonding/commitment reception. Considering that God has a huge role in this, I probably went blasphemous. Also, crack. Using for sacred_20, sanctuary. It's set in a church, after all.

( Here's a thought: how about you telling me what you're going to do to keep your horny little feather-brained bastard of a brother away from my son? )